papercranes - let them fly, and soar

Friday, June 10, 2005

There are times when we are timid and shy about expressing the love we feel. For fear of embarrassing the other person, or ourselves, we hesitate to say the actual words ‘I love you’. So we try to communicate the idea in other words. We say ‘take care’ or ‘don’t drive too fast’ or ‘be good’.
But really, these are just other ways of saying ‘I love you’. ‘You are important to me’, ‘I care what happens to you, and ‘I don’t want you to get hurt’ all mean ‘I love you’. We are sometimes very strange people. The only thing we want to say, and the one thing that we should say, is the one thing we don’t say. And yet because the feeling is so real, and the need to say it is so strong, we are driven to use other words and signs to say what we really mean. And many times the meaning never gets communicated at all and the other person is left feeling unloved and unwanted.
Therefore, I believe we have to listen for love in the words that people are saying to us. Sometimes the explicit words are necessary, but more often, the manner of saying things is even more important. A joyous insult carries more affection and love within the sentiments, which are expressed insincerely. An impulsive hug says ‘I love you’ even though the words might be saying something very different.
Any expression of a person’s concern for another says ‘I love you’. Sometimes the expression is clumsy, sometimes even cruel. Sometimes we must look and listen very intently for the love that it contains.
We say ‘I love you’ in many ways - with birthday gifts, and little notes, with smiles and sometimes with tears. Sometimes we show our love by just keeping quiet and not saying a word, at other times by speaking out, even harshly. We show our love sometimes by impulsiveness.
Many times we have to show our love by forgiving someone who has not listened to the love we have tried to express. The problem is listening for love is that we don’t always understand the language of love, which the other person is using. A girl may use tears or emotions to say what she wants to say, and her boyfriend may not understand her because he expects her to be talking his language.
We have to force ourselves to really listen for love. The problem with our world is that people rarely listen to each other. They hear the words, but they don’t listen to the actions that accompany the words or the expression on the face. Or people listen only for rejection or misunderstanding. They do not see the love that is there just beneath the surface, even if the words are angry.

"You occupy my mind every minute, night and day.... I have to do something to make myself at ease and comfortable...to make my soul rest..."

i can't fight this feeling any longer
And yet I'm still afraid to let it flow
What started out as friendship
has grown stronger
I only wish I had the strength to let it show
I tell myself that I can't hold out forever
I say there is no reason for my fear
Cause I feel so secure when we're together
You give my life direction, you make everything so clear
And even as I wander I'm keeping you sight
You're a candle in the window on a cold, dark winter's Night
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might
And I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what I started fighting for
It's time to bring this ship into the shore
And throw away the oars forever
Cause I can't fight this feeling anymore
I've forgotten what started fighting for
And if I have to crawl upon the floor
Come crashing through your door, baby, I can't fight this Feeling anymore
My life has been such a whirlwind since I saw youI been running around in circles in my mind
And it always seems that I'm following you, girl
Cause you take me to the places that alone I'd never find
And even as I wander I'm keeping you sight
You're a candle in the window on a cold, dark winter's Night
And I'm getting closer than I ever thought I might